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We camouflage our true being before others to protect ourselves against criticism or rejection.  This protection comes at a steep price.  When we are not truly known by the other people in our lives, we are misunderstood.  When we are misunderstood, especially by family and friends, we join the "lonely crowd."  Worse, when we succeed in hiding our being from others, we tend to lose touch with our real selves.  This loss of self contributes to illness in its myriad forms.

- Sidney Jourard

                                                               Therapists, mentors & coaches: an introduction

 

key points: 

 

1.)  what makes some psychotherapists, counsellors, mentors & coaches more helpful than others? 

 

2.)  links are provided to five ways of increasing therapist helpfulness - feedback, therapeutic alliance, expectancy & hope, deliberate practice & therapist resilience.

 

"The secret of patient care is caring for the patient."  William Osler

"No man is an island entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main."  John Donne

"Friendship is the single most important factor influencing our health, well-being, and happiness."  Robin Dunbar, Oxford emeritus professor of evolutionary psychology 

These are ... 

More to follow ... 

 

Now what can we best do about all these findings?  I said I would suggest responses informed by Self-determination theory, Self-identity theory, and Dunbar's Layered model of social network structure.  So  2.)  Here's a link to the next section of this chapter - Social networks: the value of a self-determination theory lens .  3.)  Here's a link to the two-part third section - Social networks: social identity & the importance of both formal & informal group memberships (background) and Social networks: social identity & the importance of both formal & informal group memberships (what can we do?).  And  4.)  Here's a link to the three-part fourth & last section - Social networks: Dunbar's 5-15-50-150 model (support clique/closest relationships)Social networks: Dunbar's 5-15-50-150 model (sympathy group & full active network) and Social networks: Dunbar's 5-15-50-150 model (assessing how we're doing).  All three of these sections give you overlapping & helpful ways of understanding personal relationship networks, assessing how one is doing, and clarifying ways of looking after & growing the health of one's relationships. 

And here's a link that will take you back to the full list of book chapters.

 

 

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