"Do not be too timid and squeamish about your actions. All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better. What if they are a little coarse and you may get your coat soiled or torn? What if you do fail, and get fairly rolled in the dirt once or twice? Up again, you shall never be so afraid of a tumble. "


Personal social networks (5th post): the frequency of conflict

March 11, 2017

Personal social networks are hugely important for our health & wellbeing, as I've underlined in the first of this six post sequence - "Personal social networks (1st post): Dunbar's 5-15-50-150 model".  However our personal networks are also regularly affected by conflicts, especially with those we're close to.  It's not a surprise - if you're very close to someone, it's likely you'll sometimes step on each other's toes.  Here are a set of four slides that illustrate this point:

And relationships conflicts have significant effects - for example, see in the slide below how important interpersonal events are in triggering depression:

... and it's no accident that the widely supported treatment Interpersonal psychotherapy treats conflict as one of its major areas of focus:

And Couples Work as well has plenty to say on how we might helpfully approach conflict:

Also very relevant here are the series of posts "Conflict: not too much, not too little - some research suggestions", "Conflict: not too much, not too little - and how to make it constructive", "Conflict: not too much, not too little - the importance of assertiveness in close relationships", "Conflict: not too much, not too little - when to get real & problem solve in close relationshipsand "Conflict: not too much, not too little - insights from game theory".