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How to live well: 7th meeting - relationships, roles, Dunbar, needs & dyads

 

           "Of all the means which wisdom acquires to ensure happiness throughout the whole of life,                                                                    by far the most important is friendship."           Epicurus

        "Friendship is the single most important factor influencing our health, well-being, and happiness."                                                            Robin Dunbar, Oxford emeritus professor of evolutionary psychology 

Social networks: Dunbar's 5-15-50-150 model (assessing how we're doing)

“ A stumble may prevent a fall. ” - Thomas Fuller

                       Social networks: Dunbar's 5-15-50-150 model (assessing how we're doing)

key points: 

 

1.)  Please would you download a personal community map (see below) and begin to fill it in. 

 

2.)  While filling in the map and afterwards, answer the items on the associated questionnaire ... and start to jot down possible intentions too.

 

Social networks: Dunbar's 5-15-50-150 model (support clique/closest relationships)

Do you want to hear my favourite procrastination joke?  I'll tell you later.

- Piers Steel

                         Social networks: Dunbar's 5-15-50-150 model (support clique/closest relationships)

key point: 

 

In this first part of three on Dunbar's 5-15-50-150 personal social network model, I introduce the crucially important inner layer - the 'support clique' of closest relationships.

 

Psychotherapy with couples & other close relationships

Over the next two days I'm due to run a two day training workshop in Glasgow on "Psychotherapy with couples & other close relationships".  Here are the downloadable slides for the first day on "Working with couples(sadly with the cartoons removed for copyright reasons) and here the slides for the second day on "Close relationships".  There are lots of relevant handouts - here are the details.

Ch.7: Families

“ A bird will drop frozen from a bough without once having felt sorry for itself. ” - D.H. Lawrence

Personal social networks (5th post): the frequency of conflict

Personal social networks are hugely important for our health & wellbeing, as I've underlined in the first of this six post sequence - "Personal social networks (1st post): Dunbar's 5-15-50-150 model".  However our personal networks are also regularly affected by conflicts, especially with those we're close to.  It's not a surprise - if you're very close to someone, it's likely you'll sometimes step on each other's toes.

More to follow ...

Personal social networks (4th post): birds of a feather flock together

I've recently written three blog posts about relationships - "Personal social networks (1st post): Dunbar's 5-15-50-150 model", "Personal social networks (2nd post): the sympathy group & the full active network" and "Personal social networks (3rd post): assessing how we're doing" Towards the end of the second of these posts I said I particularly like the paper "Do birds of a feather flock together?"&nbsp

Personal social networks (3rd post): assessing how we're doing

If you'd like to clarify and potentially look after your personal social network better, a good place to start is to chart it. You can download a simple blank chart here either in Word doc or PDF format.  Filling in the whole "Personal community map" can take a good hour or two, so possibly ... at this stage ... just put your support clique into the most central circle.

Personal social networks (2nd post): the sympathy group & the full active network

I recently wrote a blog post on "Personal social networks (1st post): Dunbar's 5-15-50-150 model".  I emphasised the huge importance of our social networks for improving life expectancy, protecting against psychological disorders, and boosting our happiness & wellbeing.  What's not to like?!  I went on to introduce Robin Dunbar's work and his layered model of personal social network structure.  I then talked about the key inner support clique layer.  Outside the support clique is the sympathy group or - stated possibly less awkwardly - outside our very closest relationships we have a layer of close relationships.

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